"Buddy": Don't Call Me That!

If you're a guy you know what I mean. You'll be walking towards a guy you know and you'll say "What's up, man?" And he'll say "What's up, buddy?" And you'll cringe and your blood pressure will skyrocket and you'll want to rub his face in the pavement for calling you "buddy." It's really the most patronizing thing one man can say to another. You may as well say to me something like "I'm smarter than you, I can kick your ass, my penis is five inches longer than yours, and oh, did I mention I can kick your ass?" How about "dude" or "bro" or "cuz" or whatever just not "BUDDY!" It makes me want to Mike Tyson the shit out of people when they call me that. I am not your little brother. And I am certainly nobody's "buddy," ever.

Parents: They're Important

I've been thinking a lot about the importance of having responsible parents since I started teaching in Philly. I'll hear from kids that they get beat up by their stepdad or they get high with their mom and it's just heartbreaking. I find it impossible to blame these kids for their lack of success in school or in life in general because most of their parents are, to put it frankly, deadbeats. How can a fifteen year old be expected to take ownership of his/her future? When I was fifteen all I wanted to do was play Nintendo, and if it wasn't for my mother I would have. I hated school, and didn't see why it was important. My mom MADE me see why it was important, even if I wanted to remain blind. Without her encouragement, I never would have gotten my fancy diploma and nice job. Every kid needs a kick in the ass, whether they go to Germantown Academy or Simon Gratz. You can blame the lack of academic achievement in urban schools on poor funding or lousy teachers, but at the end of the day, it's the PARENTS who must engage in the difficult task of motivating their children to come to school and do well. It's their job and they're the only ones who can do it.

Thanks, Mom, for doing your job.

Edit, June 2011
I sound like a complete asshole in this post. There are so many factors at work here, and it's wrong to place all of the blame on the parents. I was just at my school's graduation and was overwhelmed by the parent turnout. Most of the parents love and want the best for their kids.

Sorry, parents.

And mom, you're still rad.

Tres Unique: tUnE-yArDs

Yeah yeah it came out last year. We get stuff late out here in the suburbs. Anyways, tUnE-yArDs is the name of a one-woman band. Merrill Garbus is the name of the woman. The album's called Bird-Brains and it is wonderfully weird. It's also wonderfully lo-fi, as she recorded the entire thing herself using presumably cheap equipment. Her sound is totally original. She strums the ukelele, lays down hip hop beats, samples a baby coughing, and howls like a wild animal, among other things. Great songwriting here, too. She pours out everything, no matter how fucked up it sounds. That's what I like the most about this album, actually-she's not afraid to express herself even though most of the people who listen to this album will think she's insane. I'm pretty sure that's what music's all about.

Not a Fan Fan: Man Man

I'm always up for going to a show, regardless of how well I know the band. In fact, I've found that I'll enjoy a show even more when I know nothing about the act. No expectations are good expectations, I suppose. With this thought in mind, I agreed to accompany my good pal Dave to the Trocadero last Friday to see Man Man, a band I was pretty unfamiliar with. I had only heard a few tracks by them before seeing them, and those were heard two or three years ago. I was able to recall a certain Tom Waits goofiness to their sound, and looked forward to seeing them live. This show in particular was going to be REALLY awesome, because they're a Philly band and it sold out and they haven't toured in a long time.

It wasn't that awesome, in my humble opinion. Man Man just didn't do it for me. Their musicianship WAS tremendous, with each member playing multiple instruments with much virtuosity, and their stage antics were entertaining. I just found their sound to be, well, not good. Each track seemed to take the same route: The drummer would start a very fast, pulsating drum beat, and the rest of the band would play along, creating a throbbing headache of sound. The crowd was an unusual mix of stylish hipsters, hoodied suburbanites, and the ever-present dreadlocked folk. Not to mention the diehard Man Man fans, all of whom were wearing plain white tees with warpaint on their faces. The members of Man Man also had warpaint on their faces. They should call themselves "Brand Brand." All corny jokes aside, it was very strange indeed to see representatives from all of these groups jumping around and pushing one another to this lousy music.

I'm not saying that Man Man are bad. They're just not for yours truly. If you're a fan of more soothing, orchestral sounds, you should probably stay away from this band.

Wonderful Stuff: Teen Dream

I never really liked Beach House until their new album, Teen Dream, dropped. They were too murky and moody for yours truly, plus they came off as a bunch of smug rich kids when I saw them open for the Walkmen back in December, 2008. This new one is undeniably good, however. It's full-bodied, and it sounds like they've reached their potential. The music is outstanding on every track, from the wailing guitar line on "Silver Soul" to the catchy drum beat on "Lover of Mine" to the achingly beautiful "Take Care." Gone are the days of Victoria Legrand singing like a bratty fifteen year old-she's a grown ass woman now. Beach House have hit a home run here, and they'll be hard pressed to make a better album than this.